Monday, April 12, 2010

reflections of the journey...

It always amazes me how fast I have to jump back into life when I return from a vacation. Today has been no exception. This week is shaping up to be packed full of "life"... all of the little things that together make my reality.

So, for a few quiet moments here at home (Chad took the kids to Emme and Ebony's first 4H dog training... personally, I can't wait to see the results... {smile}) I am reflecting on the incredible week we had last week. Vacations are not an every-year-sort-of-thing here at our home; but like all things, some better than others. So, what made this one so spectacular?

~my first thought is how "overdue" Chad and I were for some time away. Honestly, we have only ever left our kids for more than one night once... and that was for 2 nights. To the best of my recollection, we have been gone from our kids about 7 times in 13 years. "Life" always seemed to be happening instead... Chad in school, new baby on the way, baby to take care of, debt to be paid off, etc. Now that they are older, it is much easier to leave them and they loved this opportunity to hang with their cousins!

~one of my great discoveries this week is that Chad and I can still talk, have fun, laugh, explore and discover without our kids. One of the things I've prayed about is that we would still have a marriage after raising and homeschooling our kids. This season of our marriage is all about our children. However, I don't ever want to lose sight of the fact that this is only a season. I want a marriage that will still be here after our kids develop their wings and fly off. I pray that I never look at my husband and see him as a stranger because I spent too much time involved in my children's young lives and not enough time involved in his life. So thankful that God reminded me of my prayers this week when He showed me that I am blessed beyond measure to have this man and this marriage!

~this was our second vacation that we paid cash for as we went along. The freedom, for me, in knowing that we had the money to go and the cash to pay for things is amazing. I have found that I truly enjoy myself much more when I don't have the nagging thought of "ohhh... I sure don't want to see the credit card bill when we get home." Please don't misunderstand me. There are many, many responsible people who can handle credit cards without wigging out. I am not one of those amazing people. I stress and worry or ignore the issue really well and so the only way for me to truly rest and relax and enjoy a vacation is if I save up the money and pay as I go.

~I spent a lot of our driving time in quiet reflection. I'm still struggling with a lot of insecurities. Insecurity rears its ugly head with me at the most inopportune times. I thought I had slain the dragon this winter as I worked through Beth Moore's book "So Long Insecurity" but last weekend was a reminder that I have a long way to go. I'm still reflecting and working through this but suffice it to say, the dragon is still alive and well. I hope someday to slay that dragon and cut off its head... until then... well, I've got a lot of work to do.

~if I ever win the lottery or become rich and famous, the first thing I will do is buy a HUGE piece of property in the Upper Peninsula of Michigan. I love the simplicity of life there. I love that people work hard and seem to have an honest respect for each other. I love the beauty of the woods, streams, lakes and Great Lakes. I love that I can't get cell service without roaming up there. I love that I can escape reality for a little while each time I go... and I plan to go often!

Reflecting is good for my soul today. Reflections of the journey that Chad and I just had tie together the reality of my life here at home with the joy of the short-term escape. Reflections make the transition of jumping back into "life" more bearable.


  1. Welcome home. Happy to here that it was more than you bargained for. :-)

  2. Sounds like you had a wonderful time and learned a lot! Thanks for sharing with us.


Thank you for your kind words!