...me too!

I've called her "Me Too!" from the get-go.  She has spent her seven years not wanting to be last... the youngest.. the one left out.  She was born to be first... just ask her.  And, yet, her days were ordained before the foundations of the earth were lain... she was predestined to be the last of our little tribe.  

My little Mercy has spent her life saying "me too!" to everything that her older siblings do.  Anything that looks enticing from her vantage point becomes something she must do... must try... must experience... regardless of her own size... age... skill level.   In her eyes, she sees no difference between herself and her brother who is 6 1/2 years older... 12 inches taller... and weighs 80 pounds more than she does.  Her heart lives by the adage, "whatever he can do, I can do better!"

Why is it I am so slow to see myself in my children's eyes... so reluctant to recognize myself in their hearts?  Makes me wonder... was I given this child only to love and to nurture?  Or was I entrusted to be her mother for my benefit as much as her own?  My mind knows this answer... my heart is hesitant to admit it aloud....

My heart shouts "me too!" more often than my child does.  I read a blogger share the struggles of publishing a book and my heart says "me too!  I want to publish a book too!"  I hear a friend gush over her newly built home and my heart cries "me too!  I want a new house too!"  I see a friend's child succeed and my heart shouts "me too!  I want my kid noticed too!"  Honestly, it doesn't matter what it is or who it is, I think my heart has wanted it too at some point.

Just as Ellen Mercy wants so desperately to not be left out of anything, my heart behaves in much the same way.  Though my Creator has a plan and purpose for my life, I often search out something else... something more exciting... something more noticed.  I see many things that catch my eye and immediately my heart squeals "me too!"

The lesson for this childish heart lately... Jeremiah 29:11...

I know the plans I have for you!

declares my LORD.

Plans to take care of you

and not harm you.

Plans to give you

the future I have planned 

for you.

...finding the joy in the journey that was ordained for me... 
therein lies the lesson of
being Me Too's mother.