Wednesday, February 09, 2011

I'd like a little faith with that, please...

...been feeling a bit like Jacob lately... feel like my heart has been wrestling with its Creator... and while I haven't had my hip socket wrenched, I do feel as if my heart has been pummeled.  

On this very cold morning, my heart hurts.  I would ask you to pray for me.  There are 2 areas of my life that I've asked healing of the LORD for 5 years and He still sees fit to not only not heal but to continue to stretch me.  

Honestly, I'm lacking in faith... I know James 1 says if anyone lacks faith let him ask of God who gives generously but right now I don't want more faith... I want complete healing. 

Thus, I am being much like a child who is not given what she wants....

I won't win this wrestling battle and in the end there will be more tears than I care to remember and I will have a very bruised and beaten up heart... this I know because I have been here before.


  1. Heidi, I'm praying for you. As I pray for you, I'm praying for me too. I could have written your posts...for yearsssss now, I could have written that post. Keep the faith, keep looking to the One who has the answers and the reasons. He is GOOD...I TRUST Him...but I hate being told NO. :(


Thank you for your kind words!